A Matter Of Perspective

I live in a trailer.  Not like a trailer park trailer, like a recreational vehicle trailer.  Four wheels and a hitch.

The majority of my dinners consist of food that my husband has taken from an over supply of meals at work.  

I can rarely spend more than $10 on an item of clothing.

The crib I used for both my daughters came from a curb alert on Craigslist.

I haven’t travelled to see family at Thanksgiving for over 10 years.


From the outside looking in my life isn’t great.  It would seem I don’t have much to be thankful for, especially this time of year, especially this year in light of recent political events.  In this past week I’ve witnessed more pain through the eyes of my friends than anyone should ever be allowed to go through.  From physical ailments to emotional hurts to death of loved ones.  It’s hard to have words.  But there’s something else I’ve done this past week: see things from a different perspective.  The old glass half full analogy, see what you have, not what you’re missing.  I know it’s hard when the glass is half full of crap.  I’ve had those times in my life and those times should be grieved.  But when the world seems to be crumbling around us, those are the most important times to take out that gratitude journal and think about things from the other side.


I live in a trailer… behind a house where two amazing families live.  My girls get to grow up with the kids in those houses.  I get to live next to my sister and walk up the stairs just to get a hug if that’s what I need. It only takes me an hour to clean my house from top to bottom (as long as my daughters aren’t around).  And this trailer… has enough room for my recycled clothes.


My dinners are scavenged from my husbands work… where they have an AMAZING chef, restaurant quality food from organic and local sources, and desserts that would be too expensive for me anywhere else.  Some people still think we’re crazy for eating so many “leftovers”, but it takes way less time for me to cook and I could never make chicken taste that good.


I haven’t travelled at Thanksgiving in over ten years… Honestly, this is a hard one.  My mother passed away the day before Thanksgiving 2005.  Eleven years ago, the year before my life started, before I met my husband, before I had a career, before I had babies.  I grieve that my husband and girls will never get to meet her this side of heaven.  I still cry.  I’m crying right now.  So yeah, how can I be thankful for that?  I’m not.  What I am thankful for is what she gave me before she did go.  She gave me my creativity, my independence, my will, the curls in my daughters hair, and my smile.  I can be thankful for all that and tell my girls every story I can remember so that Nonna is real to them.  So that Wesleigh knows if you put Nonna’s baby picture next to hers, it looks like the same kid.  I can be thankful for all that and still shed the tears.


So this thanksgiving season, flip life on its head and look at it from the other side.  Shed every tear you need to and be thankful.

-DeAndra Stone