This past week I have felt like a kid in a candy store, all giddy and excited with anticipation.
Before coming to Mosaic, I’ve never really been a person of religion. I did believe in God, and would be my peace and comfort when I was out hiking in nature with Abbie. I would say that I am a spiritual person, and while I was looking for something, I was not looking for a church. In fact. Patty does NOT go to church, ever. I have never been comfortable in any church, and always felt a bit of an outsider.
As I’ve been getting older, I’ve been searching for something in my life but didn’t really know what. One day I would say, “Hey, Susan, I’m going to read about Judaism or Buddhism,” or “I’m going to explore meditation at the Ashram.” The things that I tried never felt quite right. Church, or traditional church, was still not something that I wanted to explore, even as I was in limbo.
Shortly before Easter this year, my niece Bassett said, “Dot(that’s what Mel’s kids call me), you should come to church with us, it’s a lot of fun. There are lots of families that go and I want you to come too.” Because I love Basye so much I told her that Susan and I would come for Easter, but no promises that I’d ever go again. Easter Sunday we got to Mosaic and for a split second after I walked in I had that feeling of “oh no! What am I doing here? It’s Church!” This feeling only lasted for a second. We sat down, music started, and then Kevin started talking. Inside, I was like...this is ok,I’m liking this...he’s pretty cool. I laughed and felt ok. And in that moment, I wanted to come back.
I can’t remember if it was the first or second time we came to Mosaic that Kevin mentioned the word “Beloved.” I sat there in awe. I couldn’t shake that word off...Beloved. What a beautiful word. When we left and were driving home, I looked over at Susan and said, “Beloved. What a word. I am beloved and nobody in this world, no matter what happens or what anybody tells me, I know that I am beloved!” I was really happy in that moment, beyond happy. I’ve never really hear those words “you are beloved” before. I’ve heard a lot of negative words directed my way (and that’s a whole other story), but this one word has changed me and with that one word I started getting curious. I started wanting to explore the Bible, started wanting to explore everything more. I started setting the alarm on Saturday before bed so that we’d get up on time and go to church on Sunday. Meanwhile, Susan is looking at me thinking where has the Patty she’s known for almost 25 years gone? I’m sure she was thinking “what’s gotten into her?” Seriously, I wasn’t sure myself at that point.
I suddenly started to feel really happy, a deep inside happy. I started talking to God, chatting to him during my walks with the dogs. This past Friday I was driving listening to Klove radio station and I’m singing at the top of my lungs-the cars around me must have been wonder if I was crazy- but I couldn’t help myself, I was so happy and feeling the love of the Lord big time.
My happiness this past week is because I knew the big day was coming. I have been excited to be baptized and to continue my journey and explore where my relationship with God takes me. This, apart from officially marrying Susan 2 ½ years ago is one of the biggest steps of my life. God has changed me and I’m forever grateful and humbled for my Mosaic family for welcoming me in and making me feel part of a community that is something bigger than me.
I’ll close this with a really interesting thing that actually happened. I had a dream a few months ago. I dreamed that I was getting baptized, and I didn’t see anybody in that dream but myself and how I felt blessed. The next morning I told Susan about the dream and how wonderful it made me feel. A few days later an article on baptism popped up on my Bible app. Then shortly after that Kevin mentioned baptism. I’m sitting there all perked up, thinking my goodness...can it get any more clear of what God wants me to do? I knew in that minute exactly what my next step would be, that I was being somehow called to be baptized, that now was the time.
So here I stand today, ready to take the plunge. I will continue to explore my relationship with God, and am very excited to be taking this journey with you.